The Lazy Faire

I have a confession to make: I’m a flake. My friends and family can confirm this.  I make big plans, energetically execute them for a few days or weeks, and then get distracted and leave projects half-finished or barely even begun.

I’m a system-builder by nature.  Even when I was a kid I sometimes used to make detailed daily schedules for myself, which I invariably failed miserably at following.  I’ve always felt like if I could just get sufficiently organized, I could get things done.  But my when it comes to implementation, I always lapse back into short bursts of focus followed by a change of interest.

And it gets worse if you’re anything like me, and you spend a lot of time thinking and reading about personal development and the pursuit of fulfillment.  It can seem like the path of personal growth makes limitless demands on your time.  You know you should be spending some time meditating every day… and you should set aside some time for daily reading…  and of course a workout is essential to your health and well-being… and you should probably be writing a little every day… and spending some dedicated quality time with your loved ones… and don’t forget time for your hobbies… etc., etc.  Add in work and sleep and you find that you’ve come up with the perfect balanced schedule - for a thirty-six hour day!

A few articles I’ve read recently have helped me to feel a little less disheartened by my mercurial nature, though.  First, in “Life Balance is Overrated”, Scott H. Young writes that “Obsession, not balance, makes things happen”.  Scott points out that seeking balance in your life does not imply that you have to try to enforce balance on every day, or week:

Today, if I go for a goal, I make sure it takes a top priority, even if it means sacrificing other parts of my life temporarily.  I recently did this for a highly competitive business plan course, and now our team will be competing internationally at the graduate level.  During the last four months, my life was out of balance.  I didn’t work as much on this website as I wanted to, I spent less time with friends, and I definitely was overworked.  But those things are temporary, the experiences and achievements from that will last a lot longer.

[...]

…long-term balance doesn’t mean short-term balance.  I cycle through periods of extreme work with extreme relaxation.  [...] Going through cycles is more effective than constantly maintaining balance.  Cycles allow you to fully immerse yourself in a project or fully relax without feeling guilt.  Inserting smaller cycles into larger ones is the best way to avoid the problems of burnout or rustout that can happen when you’re temporarily out of balance.

Scott cautions the reader that this shouldn’t be taken to extremes - you still need to take a little time for your family, for instance, no matter how focused you are on your latest project.  But [politely] blowing off a few of your engagements, and letting less crucial responsibilities things slide might be worthwhile in the long run, if it means a getting a solid start on something important to you.

Then just today I ran across the concept of Tidal Homeschooling, which applies a similar principle of cycles to learning at home.  As Melissa Wiley explains, her family experiences natural ebbs and flows in their interest in structured learning.  Rather than having a strict Charlotte Mason program, or an uncompromisingly hands-off Radical Unschooling philosophy, they find themselves at different points in between at different times of the year:

The truth is, I couldn’t find any label that completely fit my family, so I made up my own. I call us “Tidal Learners” because the ways in which we approach education here change with the tide. Now, this doesn’t mean that we’re flighty or inconsistent, changing direction haphazardly. We aren’t Fiddler Crab Homeschoolers. What I mean is that there is a rhythm to the way learning happens here; there are upbeats and downbeats; there is an ebb and flow.

Even in as regular a routine as eating, variability can be good.  Some people have found benefits in a practice of intermittent fasting.  And weightlifters know that optimum results require periodization. It seems that even our bodies’ basic processes are wired to thrive on cycles.

So I think starting now I’m going to start going easier on myself for my flaky ways.  Instead of striving for daily balance, I’ll settle for life balance on the scale of months or years.  I’ll let you know how it goes.